January, 9th, 2006 Monday

[mOt-&-'vA-sh-n]

Into the second week of 2006 and things are sorta getting good for me. projects after projects for me to bury my damn head in and make a mark for myself this year. I see it as a challenge, a chance to prove my ability again ans make 'em choke.

I heard many clowns making resolutions after resolutions and never fullfiling them. c'mon be realistic. have dreams, but realistic dreams. i don't fucking make resolutions. i don't need them. the only thing in life now to me is to live life the way i want it to be and no more living to other's expectations, not anymore.

I don't need any form of external source of motivation. I self-motivate. People who really know me well knows I'm a player in this game. I can fucking self motivate myself till the extend my friends call me psycho. I'm not psychotic. Its a display of will power. Anyone can, if they have enough will power. so, screw all those fuck shit motivation talks and seminars. I don't need others to tell me how I should live my life.

We are all born with a certain amount of weight to drag around. Some pull more than others. Some get dragged down and never have a chance to grow strong. Others are surrounded by a good team and given the tools they need to survive. Sometimes you can slide through certain situations using wit and reason. Other times you have to fucking throw down to get a little respect and elbow room.

No one can make right the wrongs done to you, and no one cares to even if they could. C'mon, we all have motivation, after all, no one could get out of bed in the morning without it. The real question is, motivation to accomplish what?